I feel like I have forgiven them but the glass is still broken and Jesus is still putting it back together. I don't think I will be fully fixed until I breath my last breath. Death is peaceful, living is much harder. I am a sinful human being. I want to be more like Jesus though, I do. I want to put it all behind me. I just can't seem to do that. I feel weary even around some loved ones. I don't know what to do. Its hard for me to be out going and want to find a job or a church because Im afraid of people, I don't like them. I think I am so jumpy when someone doesn't try to hurt my feelings but does, because of my past. I am a very sensitive person. Even the slightest sense of somebody that doesn't like me, I freak. I just wish I didn't care so much about what people think of me. I get so tired of the world sometimes. Thats why I like being at home so much. I'm so comfortable here. No one can hurt me, yell at me or talk behind my back here. I'm safe at home.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Its hard for me to like people
I have been thinking a lot lately about loving people. Is it possible to not like people but love them? Not that I don't like my friends and family. Its just that I was hurt so many times by people unless people prove to me that they wont hurt me I'm on the edge around them. I think that why I get tired out when Im around people, because I'm on the edge all the time. The people that have hurt me I don't like that much. I know I should because of what Jesus has done for us. We keep hurting him all the time when we sin, and yet he still loves us no matter what we do! I know this. All my life I have been struggling to like people. Not that I am not concerned for my enemies salvation. I am. I do love them in that way.
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I have this devotion bookmarked to help me with this issue. Hope it helps.
Love you Mom H.
"It is dangerous to be concerned with what others think of you" (Proverbs 29:25 GN).
When we worry about what other people think, we let them control us. We waste a lot of time and energy trying to figure out what other people want us to be. Then, we waste a lot of time and energy trying to become like that rather than just being what God made us to be. You're manipulated and controlled by somebody else.
Worrying about what other people think is dangerous because we're more likely to cave in to criticism. It means we don't always do the right thing; instead, we do the thing that everybody wants us to do.
And we're in danger of missing God's best because we're so worried about what other people what us to do that we can't stop to think about what God wants us to do.
• Fact #1: You cannot please everybody. Even God can't please everybody. One person prays for it to rain; another prays for it to be sunny. In the Super Bowl, both teams are praying that they will win. Who is God going to answer? God can't please everybody. Only a fool would try to do what even God can't do. You can't please everybody.
• Fact #2: It's not necessary to please everybody. There is a myth that says you must be loved and approved by everybody in order to be happy. That's just not true. You don't have to please everybody in order to be happy in life.
• Fact #3: Rejection will not ruin your life. It hurts, sure. It's not fun. It's uncomfortable. But rejection will not ruin your life unless you let it.
Quit trying to please everybody! Remember that nobody can make you feel inferior unless you give them permission.
The Apostle Paul says, "If God is for us, who can be against us?" (Romans 8:31 TEV) This means we can think like this: 'God likes me, and I like me; if you don't like me, then you've got a problem. If God likes me, who cares that everybody doesn't approve of everything I do.'
Remember, nothing you ever do will make God love you less. Nothing you ever do will make God love you more. He loves you completely right now.
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